Seriously dude?! Like seriously do you have any idea half of the crazy stuff you agreed to? Did you just not read the fine print???
You didn't read any of that, like at all. So I supposed you didn't notice you agreed to "wrestle a bear on roller-skates"? Albeit, it is a bit unclear whether you or the bear is the one on roller-skates.
Or how about the part you agreed to "mind control experiments" and "reeducation" by an "unlicensed institution." Ring any bells? No, okay! Well, maybe the part where you forked over your "eternal soul," sound familiar? Yea, it should because that was in there too.
But wait, there's more! You, wholeheartedly apparently, agreed to "crash a funeral while blaring "The Final Countdown," via boombox, by the band Europe." And since you did click that agree button, I guess, y'know, it is what it is. So here are some other things you happily agreed to:
- You also agreed to be forced to listen to Gilbert Gottfried, Fran Drescher and Bobcat Goldthwait role-playing Dungeons & Dragons for eight hours straight.
- You agreed to star in a shot-by-shot remake of The Mummy... the 2017 film.
- We think you agreed to having your rear-end scanned for identification purposes, but this part was a bit fuzzy.
- You entrusted all your affairs public or private to a blind pig.
- You concurred that anyone who is dating you is "out of their mind" and "should be flogged accordingly and repeatedly with a barrage of pelicans."
And then again, there was a bunch of other B.S. that I don't even know if it is worth it to go over at this point. But since you clearly didn't read the "Understanding," you must have missed the part where the entire agreement becomes null and void (not that it would legally have been enforceable, anyway).
But, yea, you're off the hook. But be a bit more careful in the future.
* * *
ALL JOKES ARE ORIGINAL CREATIONS OF THRILL LAND
RETURN TO HOME
You didn't read any of that, like at all. So I supposed you didn't notice you agreed to "wrestle a bear on roller-skates"? Albeit, it is a bit unclear whether you or the bear is the one on roller-skates.
Or how about the part you agreed to "mind control experiments" and "reeducation" by an "unlicensed institution." Ring any bells? No, okay! Well, maybe the part where you forked over your "eternal soul," sound familiar? Yea, it should because that was in there too.
But wait, there's more! You, wholeheartedly apparently, agreed to "crash a funeral while blaring "The Final Countdown," via boombox, by the band Europe." And since you did click that agree button, I guess, y'know, it is what it is. So here are some other things you happily agreed to:
- You also agreed to be forced to listen to Gilbert Gottfried, Fran Drescher and Bobcat Goldthwait role-playing Dungeons & Dragons for eight hours straight.
- You agreed to star in a shot-by-shot remake of The Mummy... the 2017 film.
- We think you agreed to having your rear-end scanned for identification purposes, but this part was a bit fuzzy.
- You entrusted all your affairs public or private to a blind pig.
- You concurred that anyone who is dating you is "out of their mind" and "should be flogged accordingly and repeatedly with a barrage of pelicans."
And then again, there was a bunch of other B.S. that I don't even know if it is worth it to go over at this point. But since you clearly didn't read the "Understanding," you must have missed the part where the entire agreement becomes null and void (not that it would legally have been enforceable, anyway).
But, yea, you're off the hook. But be a bit more careful in the future.
* * *
“Never tell a fool that he is a fool. All you'll have is an angry fool.”
—Talmud
ALL JOKES ARE ORIGINAL CREATIONS OF THRILL LAND
RETURN TO HOME
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